Sunday, November 13, 2011

Effective Teen Habit #5 Seek to Understand...


One of the most stress related activities for any leader in any capacity is resolving conflict. One powerful principle leaders need to follow is to seek first to understand than to be understood. Our natural tendency is to seek first to make sure others understand our position rather than vice versa. The truth is when we really focus on understanding others first, they are more likely to receive our input without resistance. This principle is another example of a much bigger principle of being "others centered" rather than "self-centered." If you are concerned about the other person, you are more likely to practice this principle of seeking to understand them first.

To practice this truth, three things must be present:
  1. An attitude of humility - humility will set its own agenda aside to make sure all ears are given to hear and understand the other person. Without this, a selfish or prideful attitude may create a wedge between the parties involved and minimizing the effectiveness of communication.
  2. An attitude of kindness - leaders need to know that kindness reaches the hearts of people. Kindness expressed through sincere listening builds trust with people.
  3. A will that seeks - the emphasis here is to SEEK to understand. In other words, a leader must do more than just listen, he or she must ask questions and repeat what has been communicated to ensure both parties are "on the same page."
Leaders communicate. Period. In order to effectively communicate, leaders must listen and ask questions with the purpose of seeking to understand. Lastly, seeking to understand minimizes conflict. Conflict prevention is more effective than conflict resolution!

10 comments:

  1. Communication is a huge part of everything. It is thee main point of relationships and friendships. Humility is need in all aspects of life. You can be a selfish person you need to think of others. You need a will power also. Leaders have most of the traits and are successful.

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  2. A leader that makes an effort to comminucate and understand people while showing kindness really does deserve respect in my eyes. It's easy to lose track of the fact that other people are influenced by decisions you make in different ways and it's important to make sure that everyone agrees.

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  3. Communication is a very effective quality in being a leader. When people can communicate properly everything can go accordingly and you can be successful in your plans. When you can be a good listener and ask appropriate questions by talking in a very kind sincere matter that will get you very far. When you put someone first, it is most likely that they will put you first in later times which is a very good thing.

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  4. A good leader should try to communicate with everyone. We need to try to listen to other people so that we don't seem like we're selfish and don't care about others. In order to solve conflicts we need to have good communication with both sides of the issue.

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  5. Good leader can be shown in grown ups but also can be shown in teenagers lifes too.To be a good leader you need to learn some basic leader skills but you cant be born with them,you have to learn them on this or other way.You need to have humilty and be there for person and help him over become his fears and listen and kind of become part of it like you understed it.You need to learn to use kindness and help others with it and learn them that somewhere in world their is pure good and right now it is you.Leader needs to seek,and not only listen or give feedback he needs to go in deeper and help that person from with in.You need to understand that this is time of year when you make change in your life.

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  6. Communication is one of the most important things when it comes to being a good leader because leaders need to be able to communicate with all groups in a civil manner. With communication you also have to be able to understand what the other people are trying to tell you. A leader needs to step back and look at where the other person is coming from and if they have a reason for seeing something the way they do.A leader needs to show kindness because a person will talk to others and share ideas if they don't feel threatened or unfairly judged. A leader needs to make sure that they understand the people they are leading so a common goal can be reached.

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  7. A leader always needs to have a good attitude because communication is important and if they have a bad attidude they probably won't get their message across. They also need to listen to what their followers have to say. They need to have good traits to be a sucessful leader.

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  8. It is important to make sure you understand the other person. If you don't communicate with them that you understand them, I think they could lose some respect for you. As a leader, you don't want to lose others respect. If you are losing respect, something needs to change. A leader should definitely be others-centered. Communicate with the others that they come first!

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  9. In effective communication you will see that the listener will be content to listening to the speaker. But its easier to say that you want to communicate effectively than actually doing it. If you communicate to the audience you will have to connect to them in some manner. If you connect with them then you can get full attention. This is why many kids in high school don't seem to listen or act like they don't care. Anyone who can connect with most of your audience is very talented in my eyes.

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  10. We may say that we understand what our peers are talking about but do we really? This is why communication is very important for people to be on the same page. If you listen to people and ask them questions about what they are talking about you are more likely to understand them completely compared to just listening. Stuff doesn't stick with us if we don't care or think it is important so that could be one reason that people don't do good in school, they might listen and take notes but if they don't care or think it is important it will go in one ear and out the other. Effective communication is very important in our society.

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